I never use the self checkout, ever. Every-time I do, the thing messes up and I need to press the help button. This holds up and pisses off everyone behind me. The thing yells at me for moving things out of the bagging area!!
My guy, my bff, everyone I know uses it when they don’t have a lot of things. They keep trying to get me to try. Well, today I did. I only had orange juice and apples. So there I am waiting my turn at the self checkout, when a semi-balding middle aged man takes the orange juice right out of my hand and tells me he is going to buy it for me because he thinks I look like Tiffany Trump. He then shows me his phone which is full of pictures of Tiffany Trump, like in a weird stalker-y way. Creepy!! “I really really like her” he says.
So weird Tiffany Trump stalker buys my orange juice.( I hope he didn’t slip a roofie into it.) I proceed to try to read the teeny tiny numbers on my apples, and then he takes a picture of me and says “I really really like you too.” Well, I read those numbers wrong and the thing just isn’t working!! So I can’t walk away. This is so creepy, I’m hoping a friend of mine is playing a trick on me. Nope! He gives me the orange juice that I can’t bear to even think about drinking, and I say thank you and hope he walks away. I’m waiting for the attendant to help me because I have misread the numbers too many times and the thing is all messed up. She is taking her sweet time, and Dude continues to leer at me the entire time.
Finally! Finally! The attendant helps me kind of rolling her eyes at my stupidity and Dude walks away. I swear I will never ever attempt the stupid self checkout again!! They have cashiers who are trained to use these machines. I don’t work there! If I had used a regular line, I would have avoided Creepo, I would have been out of the store sooner, and someone else would have bagged my groceries for me.
By the way, I don’t think I look anything like Tiffany Trump. We’re both blonde, but that’s where the similarities end. Here is a picture, you can judge for yourself…